Are You Another Esau?

In Genesis 33 we find one of the most powerful examples of forgiveness in the Bible when Esau meets Jacob on Jacob’s way back to the Promised Land. Most already are familiar with the story of the rift between Jacob and Esau. This rift began in their childhood because of their parents favoritism which built up through the years to the day when Esau sold Jacob his birthright for a bowl of lentil soup. The climax of their rift takes place when Jacob, with the help of his mother Rivkah, deceives his father Isaac and receives from him the blessing which Isaac intended to give to Esau. After receiving the blessing from Isaac, Jacob runs away in fear of his life to his uncle Laban’s home.

After more than 20 years, Jacob now has two wives, twelve children, large herds, and wants to return to his homeland. He knows that when he does, he will encounter his brother Esau who he deceived and cheated out of his inheritance. So Jacob sent messengers ahead to meet Esau and try to soften the meeting with kind words of humility. The messengers returned from meeting with Esau to tell Jacob that they found Esau and that he was on his way to meet Jacob with 400 men.

Jacob knew Esau and knew that his threat to kill him wasn’t just words spoken in the heat of the moment, so he had set forth a plan to divide his family and herds into two groups so that maybe one would survive the confrontation with Esau. Then the time arrives and Jacob comes face to face with Esau which we read in Genesis 33:3-4:

3 But he himself passed on ahead of them, and bowed to the ground seven times until he came near to his brother. 4 But Esau ran to meet him, hugged him, fell on his neck and kissed him—and they wept.

As we read these words, it is easy to imagine the scene in our minds. Jacob sees his brother and humbles himself before him, bowing to the ground seven times. Then Esau runs to meet his brother, hugging him and kissing him. The family reunion continues as Esau meets his in-laws, nieces, and nephews. Then Esau heads home leaving some of his men to help Jacob with his herds.

By the end of chapter 33, Esau is home in Seir and Jacob has purchased land in Shechem. Notice that Esau chooses to live in Seir which is in Edom, outside of the Promised Land (Genesis 36:8) while Jacob purchases land and builds an altar inside the Promised Land (Genesis 33:18).  

When we read the story of the reunion of Esau and Jacob, we usually read it as a great example of forgiveness and restoration. Jacob humbles himself asking Esau for forgiveness and Esau runs to his brother, hugging and kissing him. But is this really what happened or are we reading our hopes into the text? The key to the answer is found at the end of chapter 33, where we find that this reunion and restoration was short lived. Esau chooses to leave the Land of Promise and dwell in Edom. Now the prophetic nature of living in Edom is a topic for another teaching; however, for this teaching, just know that Esau made the choice to leave the land promised to the children of Abraham and live outside the covenant blessing that G-D had made with his father and grandfather.

Esau’s choice demonstrates that while he had an emotional moment with Jacob and while he did appear to forgive Jacob for his deception, the root of bitterness and unforgiveness remained in Esau’s heart. How do we know this is true? Because of what we read in Genesis 36:6-7:

6 Now Esau took his wives, his sons, his daughters and all the people of his household, as well as his livestock, all his cattle, and all his possessions that he had acquired in the land of Canaan, and went to a land away from his brother Jacob. 7 For their possessions were too numerous for them to dwell together, and the land where they were residing was unable to support them because of their livestock.

Notice the language. Esau took his family and livestock away from Jacob, not away from the land they were living in, but away from Jacob. Notice that the wording at the end of verse seven is the same wording we find in Genesis 13 when Lot separates from Abraham due to quarrels. It is easy to see that while outwardly it seems that Esau forgave Jacob in a very emotional encounter, it is clear from reading the rest of the story that Esau’s forgiveness was simply a surface-level episode. Esau never dealt with the deep root of bitterness, envy, and anger that dwelled under the surface in his heart. 

As we read these words, we should all allow the Spirit of G-D to search our hearts so that He can reveal any “Esau” moments in our lives. Moments when our hearts were touched, our tears may have poured out, and when we were full of feelings, to see if we truly gave forgiveness or just pulled the tops off of the roots of bitterness. Even more importantly, when we came humbly to G-D to seek forgiveness, did we simply have an emotional encounter with G-D or did we allow Him to reach deeply into our hearts? Did we truly repent and become new creations or did we, like Esau, run to Him and weep only to rise up still carrying the baggage of our old man?